Fossil Soup

Coming of age... Obnoxious... But hell of a damn funny.

Yeah, short of time and in a hurry again. And a reflection on... well, it'll be self-explanatory when it's watched.

Not something I've been working on particularly because of the fact that this computer was in dire need of an overhaul due to the presence of some craziness that was contracted while I was away...

And I didn't bother to try system recovery or system restore until now. So even though things are a little choppy... I can actually access everything now, and it's only running slowly because most of the files have a copy that I'm going to end up deleting when I figure out which ones I'm going to keep and otherwise.

It's allowed me to get back into my mixer building... And six is here after V was lost somewhere in South Carolina.

1) "Big Me," Foo Fighters -- Some things never change.
2) "Spoonman," Soundgarden -- See above.
3) "Super Buck 2," Estradasphere -- Some things, however, do change. Shut up, Craig.
4) "Horoscope," Weird Al Yankovic -- I don't know why I'm possessed to include his last name even though everyone knows who I'm talking about by the time I finish the word "Weird."
5) "When I Grow Up," Garbage -- I'm gonna hear it for this one.
6) "Eminence Front," The Who -- I have no idea why I never knew this was the Who until I bothered to look it up. I guess because it seems out of place in their repertoire...
7) "The Man Who Sold the World," David Bowie -- Cocaine > heroin?
8) "Who You Drivin' Now?" Mudhoney -- Yeah...
9) "Doll Parts," Hole -- Oh boy...
10) "Suffer Little Children," The Smiths -- I had to make a repeat, something I don't usually do in this little endeavour, only because this song still moves me.
11) "Right Turn," Alice in Chains -- It's accredited to Layne and Co. even though members of Soundgarden and Mudhoney are present for this little compilation. Think "We Are the World: Seattle."
12) "Heroes," David Bowie -- Original > The Seed of Bob
13) "Music of the Night," composed by Andrew Lloyd Weber -- I don't have to explain this.

Oh, how time slips through the fingers of those who don't give a crap about it.

Posted, of course, with 40 minutes left on Friday.

There's nothing more flattering yet more dangerous than taking an idea from someone else, reshaping it with your own twists and running with it. Of course in some circles this is called "style parody." Well, in one circle. Weird Al's.

It was the way he described the song "Dare To Be Stupid," in which he detailed the emphasis on making music in the style of Devo, and Mark Mothersbaugh is quoted as saying, "I hate him for it."

Onward to the point. Every Friday, Something Awful releases a joint-effort presentation known as Photoshop Phriday, where several regular posters at the SA forums present re-worked images to provide a humorous take on a particular mingling of unlikely topics. For example:

Most offensive of all time
One of the most humorous of all time
This could go either way

Those are just some examples. The idea? Take two completely unrelated spectra, choose one for the visual and the other for the punchline and find a way to incorporate the latter into the former and PRESTO! Instant humor. Works every time. I always tend to get a good laugh because it's about as creative as one can find on the Web, and for the most part they're done really well. I came upon an idea myself that hasn't been covered by the Goons at SA, and I hate that I have no knowledge of nor Photoshop itself or this article would be a hell of a lot cooler. So you'll have to rely on the noggin to follow along.

Entitled: Politicians That Rock
The visual: political figures of recent memory
The punchline: album titles (various genres)

Hillary Rodham Clinton, "Live Through This" -- It's several years overdue, but getting through the emotions that raged in Blondie's mind during the heyday of Kenneth Starr coupled with the pressures of making a run at becoming the first President to experience premenstrual syndrome before time runs out has resulted in this timeless classic. "Doll Parts" documented a lot of the angst felt during her husband's infidelity... "Plump," well, is self-explanatory. The concept here was to be as honest, incoherent, and as unlike the Hillary we all know as humanly possible. We'd like to think she succeeded.

William Jefferson Clinton, "Who's Next" -- Quite possibly his artistic response to "Live Through This," Wild Bill felt there had to be an answer on his end. "How she gon' dis me out in public like that? The bitch know how I roll. Damn." Anthemic classics like "Baba O'Riley" where Clinton belts loudly, "I don't need to be forgiven" or openly proclaiming his acceptance of the Lewinsky affair in "Bargain" (where he states that Lewinsky was "the best I ever had") literally set the tone for the entire album, which peaks with his ironic performance in "Won't Get Fooled Again." A must-buy for Democratic Moderates and Moderate Democrats alike.

Dan Quayle, "Nevermind" -- The 80s were over. And thus Dan Quayle's career. Or so everyone thought. Upon the election of Clinton in 1992, Quayle became so distraught that he fell into a deep depression that affected several of his contemporaries, who encouraged him to find an outlet for the plethora of negative emotions felt after being betrayed by the very people who helped him in his rise to power. "Territorial Pissings" tends to stand head and shoulders above the rest in its M.O. of expression, with a close second in "Polly," a song likely about an intern with whom an affair went south. For those who are still wondering, Quayle isn't done, not by a gunshot. Er, long shot.

Dick Cheney, Metallica, the anthology -- "I was just one lucky fan who found a good sound studio. This could be you." Immortal words from likely the greatest Vice President this world has seen. Unsatisfied with only one effort, several albums were released under Cheney's name, including "Kill 'Em All," "Master of Puppets," "Re-Load" (Cheney's self-proclaimed "crown jewel"), and "... And Justice For All." Why metal? Why not?

Barack Obama, 'Fear of a Black Planet" -- Self-explanatory, but the Senator's artistic efforts were at one time never meant to be released. With the sensitivities strengthening on the issue of race, Obama was reluctant to publish the "protest" album that includes "Fight the Power" and "Anti-Nigger Machine" because he felt that such a move would be adding fuel to the fire. But at the behest of anxious record producers, the album saw the light of day, and the public ate it up. "I have no doubt in my mind that the popularity of the music was what helped get me to where I am today. I can only hope this success takes me farther."

Warning: Rapidly flashing images may cause brain cancer. One of my former bosses once said that about listening to me talk...

Well, actually, it might be the sub-par show from which this video was drawn.

But nonetheless, I'm sure some people out there think that I hate their guts, or that I'm an asshole to them for no reason at all. Well? Be consoled in the fact that there's one person I love and hate more than anyone else in this world, and this very video is for him.

If you can, try and coordinate the lyrics with the ac-- never mind. Enjoy.

It's not often I skirt the surface of YouTube for the stuff I post here, but it was so tempting to provide a blah commentary on the crappy weather that's dominated the area for the past few days with some repetitive video by Temple of the Dog that I talked myself out of it at the last minute and found something a little more uplifting to bring to the table today.

And it just so happens I was rambling about this over drinks last night. As I usually do when alcohol's involved.